That moment when you lose 42 pounds and no one notices except for the three people you explicitly told you were trying to lose weight. Yup, I’m five pounds below my clinic’s requirement BMI for IVF! And with 13 days to go until my weight check, I hope to lose more to compensate for the… Continue reading Counting My Blessings and Pounds
The good news: I hit my IVF weight. Yay! Now let’s make this stick and continue the downward trend. The bad news: Yesterday was CD 18 and I started spotting. I know it’s my period starting. This is bad because it’s way early, like at least 10 days early. I don’t even know if I… Continue reading Erratic Cycles (My Body Is Not A Wonderland)
I take over 30 pills a day, I drink disgusting fertility smoothies (I brag that I have acquired a taste for wheat grass, who am I kidding?), I get weekly acupuncture. For both IUI cycles I did all my own shots, including Menopur to the butt. And I know it can get way worse than… Continue reading Getting to My IVF Weight
I’ve written before about my doubts about my fertility clinic. I can’t change clinics until January 2018 when I change my health insurance. See, it’s complicated. I work at a university that offers its own free health insurance. The only caveat is that you have to use their health center that is only for students,… Continue reading How Do You Choose An IVF Clinic?
What makes an otherwise sane woman pee on a stick (or dip a stick in pee) once, twice, three times a day, starting on 5 dpo? What makes that woman stare at that stark white test and take pictures of it and tweak the contrast options until a line, that may or may not actually… Continue reading Hello Darkness My Old Friend (CD 3)
On Friday (3/31) I went in for my CD9 scan and labs, and was told that my follicles didn't grow and my lining didn't thicken. I had an appointment that afternoon with my fertility specialist, Dr. M, to find out the results of my Fragile X test, but since I already got the good results… Continue reading IUI #1: Cancelled.
I am terrified. I am terrified that I am in perimenopause. I am terrified that I will never have a baby with my own eggs. I am terrified that if use a donor egg, I will always feel like I missed out. This terror is cold and hard, like an enormous metal sphere, sinking deep… Continue reading What Is At the End Of My Infertility Journey?