And So It Begins…

My baby girl is 7 months old tomorrow! I have mild untreated post-partum depression that I really need to take care of. And yet it begins again - the quest to conceive. I don't know how long it will take me this time. I'm hoping I get lucky! And no matter what happens I have…

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My Breastfeeding Obstacle Course

Before I got pregnant and even while I was pregnant I always thought, “If breastfeeding works out then great, if not then no big deal.” No big deal. In fact, I wasn’t even sure if I wanted to breastfeed, but I was also 100% certain that my breasts would produce no milk. So, I told…

Secondary Infertility Fears

Someone I know is pregnant with twins. IVF twins, after 4 rounds of IVF and a possible miscarriage, secondary infertility after primary infertility. And still... I flinched when I heard it. Isn't that stupid? I got lucky with one baby, and my feelings on having/trying for a second are worthy of an entire separate post,…

Two Months Later: Birth Story and Update

Here we are at 9 weeks. I love being a mom so much more than I thought I would and I can't wait to give her a sibling. Hello, secondary infertility. Having said that, I can now confidently say that primary infertility is worse than secondary infertility. I've always hated that debate. So, my daughter…

Eight Days Old

My daughter is eight days old. My little rainbow. She came to us early, but healthy and the birth was a great experience even if it wasn't exactly as planned. I may write again to document the birth because I love to read the birth stories of my fellow bloggers. But for now this is…

My Mother. Myself.

My parents were never married and they broke up when I was 7 going on 8 years old. My mother asked me to move out with her and I, a mommy's girl, saw no other option. The year I lived with her was hard - not enough food to bring to school for lunch, or…

Not My Best Day (pregnancy update)

Today is a hard day. Yesterday I was so wiped out exhausted that I put my head down on my desk at work and nearly slept. I got home and fell asleep quite early. Today I woke up at 5:30 am and it took me hours to get out of bed and I was late…

Pregnancy Update (11w4d)

It has been a week since my last ultrasound and I have two weeks to go until my next. It's so harrowing not knowing what is going on inside me. I was able to find the heartbeat on the doppler once last week, and then two nights ago I tried again and I thought I…

An Actual Pregnancy Update (And At A Cross Roads)

I am at a crossroads whether or not to blog at all about this pregnancy. Yeah, I ventured to add the rest of the letters on to that P. Yeah, I may be taking them back still. But I've had feedback that my P updates aren't completely unwelcome, and I've also had people unfollow, maybe…

RE Graduation and First Prenatal Appointment

The day before Thanksgiving we graduated from my RE, Dr. M. At 9w6d we measured at 10w1d and heart rate was 172 (down from peak at 184.) We got a video of baby doing a little dance for us. This morning was my first prenatal appointment. I had a quick scan to see if everything…