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Smug Pregnants.

When a fellow woman with infertility is suddenly pregnant having never received any fertility treatment ever, and now everything is smuggity smug pregnant happy times in your face.

When another one manages 10 posts and is suddenly “blessed” with a “miracle” and half the updates are about “yay baby is coming”, and the other half are “zomg, look how many followers I have!”

Girl, bye.

tenor

There’s more. I have more raging inside me that I need to release and come to peace with and get in a zen place. Maybe I need to step away from some social media. I’m learning to unfollow when needed.

That is all. Today is 6 DPO and my boobs hurt from the progesterone suppositories (from my cancelled cycles that I have decided to use for my minuscule luteal phases) and I know it’s from the progesterone but it makes me remember how much they hurt when I was actually pregnant. And I am eating brazil nuts and pineapple cores and today is Day One back officially on my strict diet. (I took a month break, I feel like I’ve ruined my egg quality for the next three months but shouldn’t the 40 supplements per day be taking care of that, too? Whatever. I can’t go another three months before I try again because I’m nearly eggless as it is.)

I am frustrated and anxious. I am too busy with life to keep up with all my social media, too busy with being infertile to keep up with life, and too busy knitting with a renewed passion to keep up with anything but Netflix.

 

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5 thoughts on “Smug Pregnants.”

  1. I really don’t understand how people who have walked this journey can all of a sudden be smug when they’re “p”? It really does boggle my mind. I see the smugness in our community after the throes of infertility and I have to admit, it hurts. I don’t understand it at all.

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    1. Part of me wants to throw a ticker tape parade for myself when I am finally safely “p”, but not here. Not on my blog that is read by women struggling, not in my support groups, not anywhere within this community. I hope that when I get there I have the grace and tact of Mama Jo. My “p” celebration will be in private, or with friends and family who I know don’t struggle, and it will come with the disclaimer of my own struggle.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏻👏🏻 Exactly! Well said! That’s exactly what another blogger and I have chatted about – there are other places -other than here – to get “p” support. Society as a whole loves “p” and would be more than happy to support with a ticker tape parade.

        Bragging and being smug about “p” in this community just rubs me – others, and you — the wrong way. Our readers are struggling. And I would put the feelings of my readers before my need to be self-centered about my “p”.

        For the record, MamaJo is the only “p” who gets it and has never been smug. Every other “p” who walked infertility seems to have forgotten. Take my word for it. I strive to be like MamaJo, as you so eloquently stated. And I will always acknowledge the struggle to get to “p” and “p” celebration will not be on my blog but outside of the blog to shield readers from hurt. I’m so glad we are on the same page on this topic.

        Liked by 1 person

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